Hero Worship
by scarlett onyx
Summary: Due to a problem with Arkham Asylum's ventilation system, the inmates are reallocated to an old hotel on the rocks of Gotham Bay. What a fantastic getaway!   Right?  We'll see.  no characters or places are mine
1. Wakeup Call

"'m _tired_, Puddin'!"

"I _know_, Harley girl! Will you keep a lid on it? My head is _throbbing_…"

"_Your_ head is throbbing? What about _mine_, you clown? Where's my coin?"

"Well, maybe you used it to buy a soda at the vending machine."

"That's weak. Even for you."

"SHUT UP! I HAVE A HEADACHE!"

Dr. Leland sighed. Due to a problem with Arkham Asylum's already poor air filtration system, the inmates were all being herded into the rec-room at precisely 11:25. Pm.

The friendly atmosphere was deteriorating faster than the filtration systems and all of the rogues hadn't even arrived yet.

The door opened suddenly and Jervis Tetch strode in. The Mad Hatter looked ready to scream 'off with your head!' at any passerby and scowled blackly at Leland and the rest as he curled on the couch.

Next to arrive was Jonathan Crane, the Scarecrow, carrying a sleeping Riddler in his arms.

Harley turned her attention away from her 'Puddin' to coo at them. "Awwwww…."

Jonathan scowled, shifting Edward Nygma. "For your information, this man could sleep through a nuclear war. And I wasn't going to just _leave_ him there…"

Harley blinked, blue eyes wide. "Ya mean ya really couldn't wake him up?"

The Master of Fear sighed, shaking his head at Eddie's limp form. "No. I tried _everything _too. Calling his name, pulling off the blankets, tickling, told _every_ riddle I know…nothing." He turned to Leland. "Why are we here, anyway?"

Dr. Leland sighed again, rubbing her temples. "We are going to be evacuating. Reallocating because of a damaged part in the air filtration system."

She sounded like she'd explained it several times.

"'Reallocated'?" Jonathan asked. "To where?" Blackgate was full and Jonathan knew full well that a road-trip with the rogues would want to be avoided at all costs.

"An old hotel they've been renovating near here." Leland answered, again sounding as though this was the hundredth time she'd said it.

The Scarecrow nodded. "Interesting…"

"What's interesting?"

Rolling his eyes, Jonathan looked down at the man in his arms. "Oh, sure. _Now_, you wake up."

Eddie blinked. "Yeah…I…" looking down, he yelped as he saw how far up he was. "Where am I?"

Jonathan smirked. "The rec-room. We're going to be reallocated to an old hotel near here until they can fix the ventilation system."

Eddie yawned, shifting against Jonathan and closing his eyes again. "Oh…"

The Scarecrow shook his head. "Oh, no. I'm not carrying you everywhere. Down." He let go of Eddie, but the Riddler stubbornly clung on. "No…"

Jonathan shook his head again, squirming. "Eddie, please…_down_." Scowling, the Prince of Puzzles let go and stumbled to regain his footing. Steadying him, Jonathan smirked. "Good boy."

Eddie scowled but smiled again as Jonathan rolled his eyes. The door opened a second time and Pamela Isley was ushered in, looking decidedly unhappy at being woken up so late. Or early, depending on how you thought about it. Jonathan sighed and turned to Eddie. "That's the last of us. Looks like we'll be leaving soon."

As if on cue, Dr. Leland clapped her hands.

"Alright everyone…everyone? Over here. Thank you. Now, I need you all to follow in an orderly fashion…"

Jonathan sighed, shaking his head. That was _never_ going to happen.

As the inmates stampeded forward, he managed to catch the Riddler's arm and pull him over. "Come on." he said, letting himself get swept forward by the crowd. "I have a feeling this is going to be interesting."


	2. Road Trip

"I wanna window seat!"

"Too bad."

"_Re-e-ed!_ The sun's not even _up_…"

"I like being near the outdoors! Now, hush!"

Harley Quinn sniffled and turned beseechingly to the Joker, who was sprawled out on a seat in the battered old armored van they were in and did not look eager to share.

"Can I sit by the window, Puddin'?"

"No."

"Please?"

"I said, NO!"

Sighing, Jonathan Crane reached over from his seat and tapped Harley on the shoulder.

"There's a window seat here, Child."

Squealing happily, Harley bounded across the aisle and squeezed past Edward Nygma and the Scarecrow to get to the window.

Leaning her forehead against the bullet-proof glass, she smiled and promptly fell asleep. Shaking her head, Jonathan turned to Eddie, who was sitting, wide-eyed and bouncing slightly.

"Isn't this exciting?" he exclaimed, grinning at Jonathan. "It's like a field trip! I wonder when we'll get there? I wonder if we get to share a room? I wonder which room? I wonder if it's nice? I wonder…"

"_Please_, Eddie…" Jonathan sighed, rubbing his temples. "It's _far_ to early for this…"

Heedless of the Master of Fear's exhaustion, the Riddler opened his mouth to say more, when the van suddenly stopped with what sounded suspiciously like a choking wheeze.

Eddie blinked.

"Oh…hey, I think we broke down. Do you think we broke down? How will we get to the hotel? Is there a mechani-"

He was cut off as Jonathan, with an explosive sigh of annoyance, hugged the Prince of Puzzles to make him shut up.

A few moments passed and then the door opened, letting Doctor Joan Leland into the van. She looked exhausted and frazzled, her usually perfect hair straggling out in odd directions.

"Alright, everyone…" she began, her voice hoarse. "There's been some difficulty with the van…apparently the engine stalled, but we're doing all we can to fix it.

In the meantime, you'll all just have to be patient."

"You mean we're stuck on the side of the road in the middle of the night?" the Joker cried in mock horror. "But there's thieves and murderers out there!"

Leland sighed and headed back out the door.

"Just…stay calm."

Jonathan raised an eyebrow pityingly.

Somehow, he had a feeling she was talking more to herself than them.

Eddie curled next to him, trying to wrap around himself like a human slinky.

"I sure hope the heating doesn't break too…"

Jonathan absently patted his head before settling back against the seat.

"I'm sure we'll be fine…"


	3. New Places and Faces

"Jon? Jon-ay…wake up…Jon? Come on…Jon?"

"Oh, move over…WE'RE HERE PROFESSAH!"

Jonathan Crane sat bolt upright on the van seat. "S'nuh? Wazatt?"

Harley Quinn beamed at him. "They got the engine runnin' again and we're at the hotel now!"

Jonathan sighed, rubbing his eyes. "Oh…"

Eddie smiled and squeezed his shoulder. "Let's go inside and then you can get some more sleep, ok?"

The Scarecrow smiled back faintly and nodded.

Eddie got up and made way for Jonathan and Harley, all of them exiting the bus. Several other inmates from various other vans wandered in guarded groups, stretching and muttering among themselves as they waited to be assigned a room.

After a few minutes, Dr. Joan Leland hurried over, motioning for a guard. "Mr. Cash, will you bring these two room…" she checked a clipboard quickly, "Three-twenty one?"

Cash nodded, motioning for Eddie and Jonathan to follow him as Harley bounced up and down, waving. "Byeee!"

Waving back and yawning, the Master of Fear followed the wide-awake Riddler to the building and then blinked, looking up at the tall structure.

The hotel seemed ancient and forbidding, hunched on the rocks of Gotham bay like the remnants of some great crumbling sentry.

Eddie turned back, looking at him.

"Jon? You coming?"

A slow smile spread across Jonathan's face.

"Mhmm…"

XXXXXXXXXXX

"Wow! Look at that view! You can see all the way out into the bay!"

Jonathan yawned, sitting on one of the beds and pulling off his shoes. "Eddie, it's two o'clock in the morning. How about you admire the view tomorrow?"

Eddie chuckled. "It _is_ tomorrow."

Shaking his head impatiently, Jonathan lay down, snuggling beneath the covers.

_It was so nice to be in an actual bed. The cots at Arkham weren't exactly ideal and…was this a _feather _pillow?_

The Master of Fear smiled, closing his eyes and allowing himself to just relax and…

"Oh. My. Word. _GAR!_ COME SEE!"

Jonathan's eyes snapped open.

Standing just a few feet from the foot of his bed, a man with mousy brown hair and huge gray eyes stared at him, hands clutched in front of his chest.

And judging by the small squeaking noises that he was currently making, he was _very_ excited to see him.

"_GA-A-AR!_"

Jonathan shook his head and sat up, rubbing his eyes.

_No rest for the wicked…_

"Can I help you?"

This set off a whole new round of small squeals.

When he finally managed to compose himself, the man bit his lip and, eyes widening even more, whispered with evident awe, "You…you're _Jonathan Crane_."

The Master of Fear nodded, confused. This man…he looked…familiar, somehow…

"The _Scarecrow_!" The man's voice cracked, making '-crow' end in a squeak.

Jonathan nodded again. "And you are…?"

"Oh! Dru. Drury Walker. But…my friends…you…can call me Dru."

Jonathan looked at him, one eyebrow raised. "Ok…Dru."

Drury looked like he was about to pass out.

"Gar…" he gasped, faintly clutching at the arm of a man with reddish brown hair and handsome features that had just stepped into the room. "He _knows_ my _name…_"

The newcomer sighed, turning to Eddie, who had stepped forward from the window. "'Sup? Name's Garfield Lynns…Firefly. But most people call me Gar. And you're the Riddler, right?"

The Prince of Puzzles grinned. "The one and only."

Gar nodded, smiling slightly and shaking the offered hand.

"OH! I almost forgot!" Dru said suddenly, seeming to break out of his shocked state for a moment. He lowered his voice conspiratorially. "I don't normally tell people my…" he dropped his voice to a whisper, "_secret identity_…" Gar rolled his eyes. "…but for you, of course, I'll make an exception. I…" Dru drew himself up to his full height, hands on his hips, with his chest puffed out, "…am Killer Moth."

The silence that followed was so profoundly awkward that for a moment Jonathan thought for sure he could hear crickets.

"Well…" Eddie said finally, "It's…nice to meet you…Killer Moth."

Dru nodded emphatically. "And you too, Sir! You too!" he looked from Jonathan to Eddie, eyes still wide. The Master of Fear wondered if they were always like that. Then, thinking of what he could do to break the second awkward silence and maybe get some sleep, he said, "Hey…Dru?"

"Yes?"

"I'm kind of tired, so…why don't you go to bed, hm? I'm sure we can…talk more in the… _late _morning."

Dru grinned eagerly. "Yes! Absolutely! Come on, Garry!"

Sighing, Firefly allowed himself to be dragged over to the opposite bed.

Smiling lightly, Eddie laid down beside Jonathan, murmuring. "Well, _this_ should be interesting…"


	4. New Guard

"Do you think they're awake?"

"For the _last time_, Dru, they're _asleep_. Just like they were five minutes ago and the five minutes before _that_…"

"Mhmm…they look so peaceful…"

"Dru, if they wake up and see you _that_ close…"

Jonathan Crane woke slowly, conscious of a continuous puff of warm air against his face.

_Wait a minute…_

The Scarecrow's eyes snapped open, looking into a pair of huge gray orbs.

"_Gah-ah!_ Dru?"

Drury, who had obviously not been expecting the Master of Fear to open his eyes so suddenly, squeaked and fell backwards off the bed, landing with a thud.

"Wha? Whozatt? Lemme at 'em…"

Jonathan sighed and rubbed both hands over his faced before turning to Edward Nygma who had sat straight up at the noise, bleary eyed and holding up half curled fists.

"It's alright, Eddie…it was just Walker."

He glared at the winded man on the floor, who now tried to stand, spluttering apologies as Garlfield Lynns rolled his eyes from the opposite bed.

Annoyed, Jonathan waved off the apologies, choosing instead to curl into a ball beside Eddie and pull the blankets over his head.

Drury's eyes widened still further in dismay.

"Oh, don't mind him." the Riddler said lightly, patting the lump beneath the blankets. "He just isn't a morning person. By the way, what time _is_ it?"

The lump grumbled something about it being some ungodly hour, but Eddie ignored him as Firefly glanced at the clock.

"Nine-thirty."

Mumbling something along the lines of "told you so", Jonathan shifted into a tighter ball.

Smiling slightly, Eddie stood and stretched. "Come on, Gar. Let's go see if the guard knows when we can eat."

He winked at Dru. "You can watch Jon for me."

What sounded suspiciously like a muffled growl sounded from beneath the blankets and Eddie chuckled, calling to the lump.

"Be back _soon_!"

The lump shifted, muffling what sounded an awful lot like, "You better be."

Seeming not to hear, Killer Moth stood like a soldier. "Yes, Sir! I won't let you down!"

Eddie nodded, inclining his head with a smile as he swept towards the door.

"Glad to hear it."

Dury grinned. "I won't let him out of my sight!"

Beneath the covers, the Scarecrow scowled.

_Oh, joy…_


End file.
